Breathe...

Well it’s NOVEMBER which means NaNoWriMo!!! *WooooT WooooT* I have already started working on my novel and hooked already…although it did take me a while to get going….like only 300 words in an hour!!! I mean come on! That’s just BAD!! And now I’m writing a blog… *raised eyebrow and shaking head* …trying to figure out why I’m writing a blog when I have a novel to work on!? Maybe, just maybe it’s because I’m not stressed about reaching 50 000 words in 30 days because I know I have the week off work next week and don’t have much planned so I can push through the novel all day long instead of from the minute I get home after work till my brain shuts down around midnight.

Anyway, last week I really struggled with my asthma. I was coughing, wheezing, spluttering and just not coping well most of the week. It made me realize that man does not breathe independently. We only breathe because of our Maker and because He lets us.

I take it, if you are reading this blog that you are busy inhaling and exhaling air…if you weren’t you’d be blue in the face or perhaps lying face down on the floor….dead. Yet we go about breathing without realizing it…and then, when your asthma hits or something else happens, we realize just how much we rely on our Maker in order to breath.

Then it amazes me to think that it’s a lot easier for God to create heaven and starry hosts than it is for me to take a simple breath.

Psalm 33:6 & 9 says:

vs6 By the word of the Lord were the heavens made, their starry host by the BREATH of his mouth.

vs9 For he spoke, and it came to be; he commanded, and it stood firm.

How easy it was for the Lord to make the most ponderous orbs, the most glorious angels, only by a few words…by His breath. Just think of all those things that amaze you, those things that we stand and admire or are in aw of…wow…yeah, our God is great – for He spoke and it came to be.

Anyway, just another random blog. I think I’m going to work on my novel. You might not get another blog from me until I’ve reached my 50 000 words before the end of the month….so until then, be blessed folks.

The Lord who remains faithful forever....

“Great is Thy faithfulness! Great is Thy faithfulness!

Morning by morning new mercies I see.

All I have needed Thy hand hath provided;

Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!”

I found myself singing this last night as I realized, yet again, how faithful God is.

Just over three months ago I had surgery. Since February I had been fighting with the medical aid wondering why they would not pay for a surgery that my doctor and surgeon said was needed. In June they finally agreed to pay half of the surgery. I took a step into the unknown and had the surgery in July with a conscious worry at the back of my mind, how am I going to pay for my half?

Then after the surgery came the battle, yet again, with the medical aid that now were not paying what they agreed too and I found myself helpless in a situation where I didn’t know what to do and found myself consumed with worry that gave me many hard days to work through. The only thing I could do was trust that my God will provide all my needs.

Philippians 4:19

“And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.”

And that is exactly what my God did. So much has happened in the last 2 weeks that last night, as I lay in bed, I realized God’s faithfulness to me even when I doubted and let Him down. God has provided for my need that as of yesterday, the surgery is completely paid for. PTL!

God provided in a way that amazes me and I find myself awed by it. And not only that, but by His timing too. There are a few things I’m really struggling with at the moment and wondering if God will pull through….and now I can remind myself in this hard time that God IS faithful, because He just proved it in one area, and that I just need to trust and know that His timing and plan is everything.

Psalms 146:5-6

“Blessed is he whose help is the God of Jacob,

whose hope is in the Lord his God,

the Maker of heaven and earth,

the sea, and everything in them –

the Lord, who remains faithful forever."

Trials....

Sometimes in life, we come across stuff we don’t want to face. We try to ignore it in hope that it disappears or doesn’t happen….and unfortunately the day comes when you realize there is nothing you can do. I seem to be having a lot of those things cropping up lately that I wish I didn’t have to face. Kinda wish I could sleep and not wake up till a long time afterwards. Good thing God doesn’t let us do that or I would forever be asleep and miss all His plans for me. Knowing God is in control is great and encouraging, but doesn’t always make it easy.

This past week was a bit of a rough one with a lot of stuff coming up and getting to me. There were things I was looking forward too, things I weren’t. There were a couple of nights….ummm….mornings when I couldn’t sleep cause things running through my head. I pushed myself a gym in hope of letting go of frustration and tiring myself out that I would climb into bed at night and pass out. That failed me, by the way.

Unfortunately there is nothing I can do about the various trials I face…big or small. But I can try and be happy (which actually sounds crazy) because The Bible says:

My brothers and sisters, consider it nothing but joy when you fall into all sorts of trials, because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance.

James 1:2-3

So anyway, these thoughts came to me this afternoon as I sat outside for a few minutes alone…although there were kids running around me….looking at the moon.

I did have one good laugh today. My niece apparently went to my brother and said, “Dad, when is Aunty Jacks getting a husband because I want more cousins.”
No pressure right??? Ha ha ha ha…..

Life is meaningless...

Ecclesiastes 1:2
"Meaningless! Meaningless!"
says the Teacher.
"Utterly meaningless!
Everything is meaningless."

Everything in this world is meaningless. Solomon searched everything under heaven and found everything to be meaningless in life. Nothing last. Things we do to give us pleasure don't last. The whole book tells us how life is meaningless.

BUT...at the end of chapter two it says:
"A man can do nothing better than to eat and drink and find satisfaction in his work. This too, I see, is from the hand of God, for without him, who can eat or find enjoyment? To the man who pleases him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness, but to the sinner he gives the task of gathering and storing up wealth to hand it over to the one who pleases God. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind."

Our youth pastor, the past two times he has preached, has preached on Ecclesiastes. I've been thinking about life being meaningless without Christ, more specially after hearing about a teenager, who came to our youth group at church on and off over year, committed suicide over the weekend. It saddens me that people in this world really get to a stage where they think there is nothing left for them and their only option is suicide. After my trip to Cape Town and seeing these kids and wondering what chance they even have in the future without Christ and knowing love, makes me realise how important it is to get the Word out there!

People in this world always search to find their purpose in living. Many of them feel life is meaningless and empty, because they don't know our God who gives us happiness in the things we do.

If there are any young folks out there who feel you have no reason left to live and your life is meaningless, know that life is UNTIL you know CHRIST! I encourage you to pray and realise Christ's love for you, the love that never fails. He wants to have that relationship with you. If you're willing to accept His love and forgiveness and have that relationship with Him, this life on earth, which is meaningless to a point, will give you a greater reward one day when you die and get to be with Him in heaven.

Back home...

I'm sitting here in Johannesburg this beautiful sunny day...although I'm inside with a killer headache sitting behind the computer which is probably making my headache worse but anyway. I'm also watching Pirates of the Caribbean....kinda wishing I was sleeping.

So I'm back from the Cape and the Free State. It was an incredible, challenging and rewarding. I learnt a lot and experienced things. I've gotten to meet great people too.

Travelling around Cape Town to the various schools was interesting but also sad. To see where these kids come from is just heart breaking. You wonder what chance they will even have in the future.

It is now evening. My sister, nephew and niece popped in for lunch and we landed up watching MacGyver which my nephew now enjoys much to my sisters delight. I then went to my parents quick and now I have lost my train of thought for this blog. :)

It's probably due to the lack of sleep and that my mind isn't quite focused at the moment. Anyway, thought I would add some more pictures for you. One afternoon on driving back to Fish Hoek we saw a whale! So the blue picture with a black dot is the whale's tale. That evening I sat on the beach and took photos of the dogs running along the beach. This sheep dog was having loads of fun on the beach chasing the tennis ball his owner was throwing for him. I then have a picture of a little girl, I took this picture of her in Springfontein which is were I spend a couple of nights after being in Cape Town and before heading home yesterday. We stayed on a game farm for two nights. The host were lovely people. Where we sat having breakfast and supper, we were always had a giraffe watching over us....was interesting. Thursday night was a beautiful sunset in the bush.










Well that's it for now. Its going on for 7pm and I haven't started supper...so I should probably get cracking.

Blessings

Here Fishy fishy.. ...

So here I sit in my room in little Fish Hoek as the sun sets and the wind blows. It’s been an interesting four days here so far, weather changes so much. For me it’s been the calm before the storm. The week ahead I think is going to be fun and challenging all together. I’m really looking forward to it.

Anyway, this is just a quick blog with a couple of pictures.
Blessings.

TOP PICTURE: Looking over Simons Town
MIDDLE PICTURE: Fish Hoek, my home away from home the next few days
BOTTOM PICTURE: Children

Taking Off....

....well kinda.

It's been an incredible two weeks of hectic work and learning. Yesterday I did my first video recording of an interview. :)

Those of you who know me know I love being behind the camera taking pictures. Well, for the next 6 weeks I have the opportunity to not only take pictures but also take some video footage. This has meant having a crash course in using a semi-pro camera, as well has sound and mics. It been very interesting and very fun. I am really looking forward to the challenge and thank God for opening this door for me.

I actually had two doors open for me, this one which is work related, and another one which wasn't. It's sad that the other door has had to close but I'm really up for this challenge and really hope to use my "eye" for some good pictures and footage.

So, over the next few weeks, I'll try keep you updated as to what is happening and where I am in SA. Tomorrow I head North from my little abode to Hammanskraal (good luck my foreign friends on trying to pronounce that) for two and a half day outings.

Pray for me on my journey, for health and strength to get through the days. But also to know when to say no if I need a break so that I don't burn myself out. Doing one days photography can be tiring so who know what video and photography in a few days in a row will be... ....
Since its spring, I thought I'd throw in my butterfly picture I took at a friends game farm to liven up the page.

Behave folks!! :)
Blessings

The movie INK....

IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: Before I start, I've added two links sections to my blog page. There are links related to TWR, both TWR global and TWR Africa. I also feature under the TWR Global Staff list if you're interested...if not that's cool...the other link section will be favourite links that I find as I go along life's journey. AND NOW...BACK TO THE MAIN "SHOW"! :O)

There is this new movie that I’ve taken a liking too, and I know that most of my friends who have watched it DO NOT like it simply cause they don’t get it (or there isn’t enough blood and fighting…..go figure!!) Honestly, I didn’t get it the first time I watched it, but it had caught my attention enough to want to watch it again to get a better understanding and now, I’m afraid, I am hooked!!

It’s called INK. It’s an independent movie that never made the big screen, I can’t figure out why it didn’t, while others are probably glad it didn’t. It’s not a Christian movie and unfortunately it does contain bad language in the first half of the movie, but every time I watch this movie, I notice something new but the main thin is that it makes me think more about the spiritual battle that goes on around us.

“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms” – Ephesians 6:12

We as Christians know that life isn’t hunky-dory and it’s definitely is not easy just because we’re Christian, but we have the knowledge of knowing that Christ is in control and we can put our trust in Him. A lot of the time, when life turns for bad, we have “why?” questions. I know that I wonder why my friend and colleague recently had to loose her 7 year old daughter; I’m sure she wonders why too. When life gets us down and we start asking why and doubting (at least I sometimes begin to doubt) I think we make the devil one happy person (although I’m not sure if the devil could ever be happy) because that’s what he want. He wants us to start doubting God, doubting His faithfulness to us, His unfailing love towards us.

The spiritual war is all around us and is an ongoing battle and we are told to put on the armor of God so that we can take the stand against the devils schemes. Satan will not give up any ground without a fight when it comes to doing the work of God. He will attack us. Thankfully, we have a mighty power than one can’t comprehend on our side:

“I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms, far above all rule and authority, power and dominion, and every title that can be given, not only in the present age but also in the one to come.” – Ephesians 1:18-21

So take heart, for the battle has already been won. Satan is already defeated, Christ conquered the grave. “..because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world” 1 John 4:4

Anyway, not to sure what the main point of this blog is about…guess this is what happens when you write something over a couple of days I guess. But I do suggest that if you can, watch Ink. (See the INK link under favourite links)

Friends...

So yeah, the soccer world cup has come and gone...the final wasnt the result I was hoping for but some things just dont work out the way we hope them too.

I've been thinking about what to write with all the stuff happening in life at the moment....although it's actually not THAT much but for me it is. The past few weeks have been rough and emotional. Some of you may know, so of you not, but I had surgery close on three weeks ago. It has been a hard emotional ride because of things leading up to the whole surgery. Recovery has been frustrating, it will take anything between 6 and 8 weeks...and I'm already frustrated with it all and I'm not even half way.

But I think the main reason for writing this blog, which I hadn't actually planned to do, was because I've realised through this how important friends are. I've realised in life, that some friends will let you down when you dont expect them too, and other friends arrive and show encouragement and care when you dont expect it.

I have an amazing group of friends at TWR who have gone the extra length to encourage me and stand by me. It's been an extreme blessing for me to realise how priveledged I am to have them and to be able to call them my friends. They each contribute differently and in various ways.

So this blog is for you guys who I'm glad to have as my friends. You know who you are. You guys totally ROCK!!

KE NAKO

Ke Nako....Wow…a week to the end of the world cup and I thought by now I would be trying to decide who to support in the final stages but yay, actually double yay, as my two teams are still in the world cup and looking strong! Netherlands and Germany … woohooo!!! I think I might even find myself in the horrible situation of having my two favorite teams in the final but that would be totally cool.

I managed to book tickets for four games and thanks to my brother, I managed to watch another two games live. It was unbelievable. The count down to the start of the games. People putting the SA flag on their cars and flags of other countries they were supporting. The vibe on the day of the opening….words can not explain it. South Africa has been unbelievable and I am proud to be a South African.

I rooted for South Africa since it is my home country, and I was extremely proud of our boys. We didn’t get far but they played well. Netherlands and Germany were my other two teams I rooted for, and then I made sure I choose a team for every game I attended.

My first game wasn’t hard to know who to root for as it was Netherlands vs Denmark. Netherlands won (2-0) that day and made the start to my world cup live games great. It was held at Soccer City! What a beautiful stadium! WOW, very impressive.

My second game was USA vs Slovenia at Ellis Park. I went with my American coworker Ryan Seal and we were rooting for the USA. It was definitely one of my most entertaining games mainly because Ryan made it entertaining, but USA sure played well. To be 2 – 0 down and come back to draw the game was unbelievable! They should have won but we won’t go there. =)

The very next evening I went to Loftus with my two brothers and oldest nephew to watch Cameroon vs Denmark. It was my first of three late night games for me. It was a good game too. Both Cameroon and Denmark lost their first games so both teams had to win. Unfortunately one team won and the other team knew they were out of the world cup. Denmark won 2 – 1 and Cameroon knew their world cup was over. After the final whistle some Cameroon players fell to the ground as reality hit them.

My forth game was Germany vs Ghana!! I was a bit bummed because I wanted to see Klose play, but he got red carded in the previous game and had to miss it, but it was still a good game and another late night. Stephan, who got to the game late, couldn’t remember where he parked his car, because he parked it, locked it and started running to the stadium….so the two of us walked round the dust trying to find his car….so the early morning, around 1:30am Stephan dropped me off at home.

Two days later I was off to another late night game. This time I was the driver as I drove my sister and a friend, Dylan, to the Spain vs Chile game. I wasn’t too sure who to root for in this game, but when a Chilian guy walked up to us and asked if we all had our tickets and us staying yes and him looking at me saying, are you sure, I realized my ticket had fallen out my pocket and freaked….then they guy pulled out a ticket and asked if it was mine. I was relieved when I saw my name on the ticket…and could have kissed the guy…

Anyway, it was a dirty game first half and we were so sure that we would have a fist fight in front of us, but thankfully there wasn’t. Spain beat Chile 2 – 1. Again, I got home after 1am.

That was supposed to be my last game but the next day my brother phoned me and said he had a spare ticket to the England Germany knockout game, was I interested? Was I interested???? What a question! I had really liked to have seen Rooney play and now was my chance. Not only that, but Klose would be playing for Germany. So my two brothers, my dad and I had a road trip to Bloemfontein for the game. It was a FANTASTIC game, and seeing Rooney playing live was special even if I was rooting for Germany. Klose scored the first goal and I was extremely happy. It was great game. We had left home at 7:30am on Sunday morning and my dad and I got dropped off at 12:45am Monday morning so it was a VERY long day for a game, but oh so worth it. It definitely became my best live game.

And so that is my update of my live games. Since its late, I’ll have to blog again another time to mention the players I really enjoyed watching play live… …in the meantime, my bed is calling.

Coffee and Soccer

So I'm sitting here this beautiful Sunday afternoon with a BIG mug of coffee flicking between two soccer games, Manchester United vs Stoke and Chelsea vs Wigan. I am hoping that some how Wigan beats Chelsea and Manchester United beats Stoke to win the premiership....but I know the chances are slim.
I know in just under an hour I'll be frustrated cause Chelsea will probably win and win the premiership and there isn't much I will be able to do about it from here.

But, this is not the reason for my blog. I'm writing this blog for my friend Hanna, who was the one who brought it to my attention last week that I had not written a blog in a long time (that was before I wrote the Faith one)....so I asked her what I should write on, and she suggested coffee.

So Hanna my friend, as I sit here flicking between the soccer, knowing that your team will probably win, here is a coffee and Soccer poem/blog just for you!

COFFEE AND SOCCER
There is this wonderful thing call coffee,
Some people like it as much as toffee.
It’s a wonderful thing to start out your day,
It can make your day sunny if it started off grey.

Perhaps not every one will agree with me,
I know lots of people prefer drinking tea.
But each person has their own favorite drink,
For me it is coffee cause it makes me think.

If you noticed at the start of this blog,
I’m sorry I did forget to mention I’m sitting with my dog,
I did however mention that I have this big mug,
That’s now half empty of my type of “drug”.

I think perhaps its time to refill my drink,
Cause as you can see it is making me think.
Yes I know that perhaps this poem is a bit lame,
But it’s hard to write when you’re watching two game.

The chances now of my team winning,
At this point in time is greatly thinning.
Two goals up are Chelsea at this time,
I somehow wish they could be covered in slime.

I’ve jumped up and down as my team scores again,
One of my dream has happened, here let me explain.
I had wished for my soccer hero to score here today,
Ryan Giggs is a legend, that’s all I can say!

Half time whistle has been blown,
And my mug is now dry to the bone.
Time to fill it up for the next half,
I hope that there was at least one line to make you laugh.

So there you have it, a lame poem written in just over 45 minutes while watching the soccer. No matter the outcome of these two games, I am a proud Manchester United fan and Ryan Giggs is a legend!!! (hee hee)

GO RYAN GIGGS!!!!!!! (hee hee)

::: Jacky breaks out singing Glory glory Man United since its halftime :::

p.s. Cant wait to get my Giggs shirt!!

FAITH: Greater worth than gold!

So I haven’t blogged for a while…mainly because I’m so consumed in frustration and anger that I haven’t really known what to write about and when I start writing I end up being annoyed. Maybe today will be different…so far so good! I know being consumed by anger is bad and I try hard not to be, but there are things that just push one over the edge at times and it’s hard to pull yourself back up onto the safe, flat, "let go of anger" zone/ground.

I also know anger is a strong word so perhaps I should say that it is more frustration that has been affecting my life the past few weeks….okay so the past few months. When you wait for something to happen, like I’ve been waiting for 12 weeks now, and it doesn’t “work out how you want it too”, it’s hard not to get frustrated and then angry with the people involved especially when it messes up with one’s emotional and mental state. (Patience and God's timing comes in here too)

I was watching House the other day, (yes I was taking a break from CSI New York for once) and of all programmes, one of the characters in House quoted a verse that hit me and I naturally went backwards in the programme to get the reference for the verse. It’s been one that is sticking to my mind and one I try bring up on the days I feel I could do some serious damage to these people who are causing me this frustration and ultimately, anger.

1 Peter 1:6 & 7 says: “In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a LITTLE WHILE you may have had to suffer grief in all KINDS of TRIALS. These have come so that your faith – OF GREATER WORTH than gold, which perishes even though REFINED by FIRE – may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed.”

WOW…I had read this verse before but I guess I had never read it in a time when I was really struggling with a trial. I didn’t like the fact that it says “kinds of trials” cause at that time I was only going through one and didn't want more….but the best part that really hit me and I’m sure I must have misread this verse before, is that my faith in my God is of greater worth than gold!! Woohoooooo for that!!!

My friend Jeanne in the States has given me some good laughs over the years and last week, after complaining about a “mountain”, joked with me that I should have faith as small as a mustard seed to move mountains. In our joking back and forth about moving mountains (and weather), the reality has came through, loud and clear, that I have, unfortunately, been lacking faith in my God who has always proven Himself faithful to me.

I guess by writing this, and understanding and admitting where I stand right now, I want to encourage myself, but more importantly I want to encourage those of you out there who are also struggling with life right now, especially if you think your faith in God is low. Keep on keeping on and keep the faith….it’s worth more than gold!

Only the strong survive...

Hard to choose a title for this one. I went for only the strong survive....mainly because Christ gives us strength.
2010...wow, I was somehow hoping for a better start to 2010 than what has happened. Actually, if I put the positives with the negatives, the positives definitely out number the negatives but when you have something that is constantly at the back of your mind, its hard to spot the positives.
I'm not going to mention the MAIN negative that's I'm struggling with...I'm simply going to say that each day when I struggle I realise more and more that Christ HAS TO BE my strength, I cant get through this on my own at all. I'm thankful for my close friends and family and more for the fact that God loves me, and hard as it is, HE is IN control!
ON the positive side, it is 2010 and that means SOCCER WORLD CUP! I cant actually believe its less than 100 days till kick off....and I cant actually believe I got tickets! I'm so stoked about going some games and getting to see two of the teams I'm supporting. (Netherlands and Germany)
Anyway, this was just a short blog since I haven't written this year...
...thought I would end with this video clip that I got on email the other day. I just love it.
Hope everyone out there is well.